book cover of Raise the Gipper!

Raise the Gipper!

A novel by

Are you feeling trapped between Barack and a hard place?

Do you wish the crazy righties would keep their Mitts out of your life?

Does it seem like a really, really long time till November 2012?

Does everything this election year seem like brainless, rancid nonsense to you?

Then what you need is more nonsense about a guy who just wants brains and happens to be going rancid!
It's time to raise your glass!
Time to raise your spirits!

Short, silly, and containing not one bit of respect for the candidates, the election, or democracy itself, here's the book to hide in till it's all over; when those too-serious people try to talk to you about grave political issues, avoid them with a politician who is fresh out of the grave.

Set at the Republican Convention in 2012, this novel displays an eerie ability to contain not one single event which is at all likely to happen. Well, except maybe the oil companies planning the conversion of every living thing in northern Alaska into pink slime. Or Ron Paul being called on to sew a zombie together. But even those are fairly unlikely.

Discontented with Mitt Romney, who they perceive as merely a warm body, the Republicans decide to go with a cold one. (In fact, it will help if you read this book with a cold one). With a mere bit of messing with the Powers of Evil (nothing scary -- just alien invaders who intend to eat the planet, not the real and frightening ones like the financial industry) the Republicans bring their last really likable candidate lurching back from the grave.

He immediately reveals an ability to bring out the best brains in the party, even if he has to go in and get them.

It's a silly story that will take your mind off the election, and in addition to Zombie Ronald Reagan, at no extra charge this book includes:

. Millennial romance!
. Evil space bats!
. Cute cats!
. Plagues of jellyfish!
. Twice the Rosicrucian mystic nonsense of the average ancient conspiracy novel!
. Awful things happening to Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul, Sarah Palin, Mitt Romney, and Rick Santorum! Come on, you know you want to see that!
. The world's biggest moose grinder!
. Divine intervention!

and a whole lot more, but absolutely nothing serious.

If all the politics on TV and the internet is making you think, "I need a cold stiff one" -- here's just the cold stiff one you've been hoping for!

Remember: Zombie Reagan in 2012.

You might as well have some fun this summer, because you're going to have pick the lesser of two evils all too soon.

Genre: Horror

Used availability for John Barnes's Raise the Gipper!

Kindle Editions

April 2012 : USA, Australia, Canada, UK Kindle edition

Title: Raise the Gipper!
Author(s): John Barnes
Publisher: Metrocles House
Availability: Amazon   Amazon UK   Amazon CA   Amazon AU