Well before reading became a thing (even before softcore teenage vampire pornography!) people would gather in their public squares and vomitoriums to listen to the great orators spout important rhetoric. In an age where people couldn''t read, and most authors didn’t include pictures (the cost of crayons was prohibitive), poets, politicians and philosophers alike attracted huge audiences of listening rabble. Today, your occupation doesn’t even have to start with the letter ‘p,’ and you too can draw crowds with your golden tongue and swanky opinions.
Of course, I understand that not everyone has the immense power of speechification that your humble author does at hand, so I have designed this handy-dandy guide for you, the nervous nellie with the bladder problem. The next time you’re called to speak in public, do not despair! I am here to help you navigate the waters of extemporaneous speech! Simply commit these passages to memory, and you too will be ready to regale the common throngs with your sharp wit and velvet tongue!
This book is both a complete instruction manual on how to be an amazing public speaker and also contains a variety of ready to go speeches for any occasion: weddings, funerals, alien invasions and other apocalypses; there is no other guide more ready to arm you with the magical skills of excellent speechification!
Of course, I understand that not everyone has the immense power of speechification that your humble author does at hand, so I have designed this handy-dandy guide for you, the nervous nellie with the bladder problem. The next time you’re called to speak in public, do not despair! I am here to help you navigate the waters of extemporaneous speech! Simply commit these passages to memory, and you too will be ready to regale the common throngs with your sharp wit and velvet tongue!
This book is both a complete instruction manual on how to be an amazing public speaker and also contains a variety of ready to go speeches for any occasion: weddings, funerals, alien invasions and other apocalypses; there is no other guide more ready to arm you with the magical skills of excellent speechification!
- "Michael Allen Rose, much like Joe R Lansdale, is a genre unto himself, and always an enjoyable read." -- Brian Keene
"The best and most ridiculous guide to public speaking since my untimely death!" -- The Ghost of Abraham Lincoln, apparition and former president
Used availability for Michael Allen Rose's Inappropriate Toasts for All Occasions