The city patched itself. The couch became a turret. Now the street wants tribute.
Evan Cross—laid-off civil engineer turned Fortifier—steps outside his hard-won Home Lot and finds the block plated, humming, and smug. The Cityfather’s grid is live, the lanes are lying, and a robed mason-priest is running traffic with a whistle and a bucket cult. Tribute inspection in 30 days. Paper, not magic. Great.
Good thing Evan has a team: Nina (paramedic, voice like a metronome), Dax (routes, not biceps), Orin (human clipboard), and Diesel—the house cat who ate a tutorial and unionized. Diesel just evolved into a Bulldozer Tiger with Ram Raid T2 and OSHA Purr—an audit aura that makes goblins put on eye protection out of shame. Homefield doubles when he loafs. Bureaucracy has a new foreman, and it’s purring.
Expect alley killboxes, rooftop stretcher runs, a stairway Permit Court, and a street-level rhythm war where brace cadence beats boss whistles. No stat dumps—just cause → effect: stamp a brace, hang a plate, breathe on the downbeat, watch the lane behave. When the priest finally meets floor + policy, it isn’t fate; it’s hardware.
If you like Discworld-flavored LitRPG with zany humor, minimal numbers, and a talking cat who weaponizes workplace safety, welcome to the party. The rules are simple:
Evan Cross—laid-off civil engineer turned Fortifier—steps outside his hard-won Home Lot and finds the block plated, humming, and smug. The Cityfather’s grid is live, the lanes are lying, and a robed mason-priest is running traffic with a whistle and a bucket cult. Tribute inspection in 30 days. Paper, not magic. Great.
Good thing Evan has a team: Nina (paramedic, voice like a metronome), Dax (routes, not biceps), Orin (human clipboard), and Diesel—the house cat who ate a tutorial and unionized. Diesel just evolved into a Bulldozer Tiger with Ram Raid T2 and OSHA Purr—an audit aura that makes goblins put on eye protection out of shame. Homefield doubles when he loafs. Bureaucracy has a new foreman, and it’s purring.
Expect alley killboxes, rooftop stretcher runs, a stairway Permit Court, and a street-level rhythm war where brace cadence beats boss whistles. No stat dumps—just cause → effect: stamp a brace, hang a plate, breathe on the downbeat, watch the lane behave. When the priest finally meets floor + policy, it isn’t fate; it’s hardware.
If you like Discworld-flavored LitRPG with zany humor, minimal numbers, and a talking cat who weaponizes workplace safety, welcome to the party. The rules are simple:
- NO KINGS. FEED CAT.
ONE STRETCHER.
TEMP = LIE → FOAM.
Click Buy Now or Read for Free with Kindle Unlimited and join the block as Evan’s crew claims the street, shames the goblins into PPE, and turns paperwork into power. The inspection clock is ticking. Let’s make this district queue.
Genre: Fantasy
Used availability for Craig Zerf's Block Party